Fine Tuning

Isn’t it just great that when you think you’ve got it, you don’t? It’s been an occurring theme in my mission.

Ether 12:27–“And if men come unto me, I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”

So He’s saying that when we finally get the humility to come to Him, we get smacked in the face with weaknesses? That’s exactly what He’s saying. He never said it was going to be easy. Coming on my mission, and even in the MTC, I thought that if I just slowly but surely work at all of these things, they will come. However, I have learned that I still have to work slowly and surely, but they don’t come all on my time frame. This is what I call fine tuning.

Yesterday, we spent a lot of time on chatting. There weren’t too many people at the Hill Cumorah so we had time to get our brains fried. Teaching people online is probably one of the most mentally draining thing I’ve done. (Besides producing my first show at True Blue.) We get every single kind of person from all over the world asking absolutely anything they want to. We had some great conversations–members who didn’t know quite the correct doctrine and are too afraid to ask their leaders in person, investigators with their missionaries who are making sure this is the truth, and Bible-whizzes sincerely wanting proof that the Book of Mormon is real. However, we do get some who are bored, and just want to argue. That’s when I know my study for the next day will be centered around Preach My Gospel Chapter 6: Christlike Attributes. I never knew how upset I really can get when someone jokes about my Older Brother. What they don’t know is that this could bring them happiness. Pure joy. That person they are speaking lightly of can literally save them. That’s when I have to tell myself that the war in Heaven is continuing and it’s little annoying Satan that wants to make my job more difficult.

In Doctrine and Covenants 84:88, Christ says, “And whoso receiveth you, there I will be also, for I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.” Now tell me that isn’t comforting? That single scripture (along with many others) has pulled me through those rough times. There is no other person in the entire universe that could give me the feeling I get when I know He is lifting me up, and magnifying my words.

One of the most memorable experiences I’ve had at the sites happened just last week. Sister Graham and I were working at the Peter Whitmer Farm in Fayette. We were chatting online waiting for some people to come in for a tour. Finally, a very cute Canadian couple, each not over 5’5″, walked in and said they were “site seeing in Western New York.” (Um hello…? There’s a barn over there, a tree over there…oh and a corn field across the way!) So as you can tell, it was the Spirit that led them here. They introduced themselves as Mr. and Mrs. Latley. They were Catholic, and hadn’t heard of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints before. They said they had 15 minutes before they had to leave, so I took them straight to the log home. As we were walking there, I gave them the watered down version of the Church. Hard to do? Yes. As soon as we got in there, I just took a deep breath, and said, “So this is where the Church was organized.” Apparently the spirit magnified my voice, because they got silent. I let their heart and eyes wander for a bit, and then I went on to explain what happened on the day of April 6, 1830. Mrs. Latley then said, “You mean to tell me, that this is the same church that Jesus Christ formed on the earth?” I said “Yes, and nothing has changed.” I then explained the Book of Mormon and where the record came from. Mr. Latley then questioned the use of the Bible for us and I told him that the Book of Mormon, in fact, proves that the Bible is even true. That’s when both their eyes got very wide, and listened to even more of what I had to say. After about half an hour, I had explained most of the details of the Restoration. They mentioned they had never felt like this before, and telling me when their next trip to the sites would be. Without even me asking, Mr. Latley gave me his card for me to call them and explain more. Now, five days later, we have exchanged e-mails back and forth and they are doing some “real soul-searching, and will call me with any questions.”

The reason that experience was so memorable, is because I could physically see the spirit working on them. They knew that what I was telling them was true, and they could not deny it. They gave it away right in their eyes. They were absolutely impressed with the dedication, diligence, and spirituality that all of these young sisters have. What they didn’t know, is that we don’t do this on our own. The spirit worked through me to invite them back to the Hill Cumorah Pageant, and then for them to ask me to  personally give them another tour of the sites next year.

The experiences I’ve had this week have fine-tuning in patience and love to help me be a better daughter, sister, mother, wife, and friend. Yes, I came to Christ. Yes, I did realize many more weaknesses in myself. But that’s just because it gives me the opportunity to make them stronger. This is a lifelong journey and I will continue to be humbled with weakness. I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Thanks, again, for all of your support. The missionaries appreciate it more than you can even imagine, and going home after a long day, knowing that someone still remembers you, is one of the best feelings in the world. Thank you so much. I hope you all have a great week!


Sister Hawkes


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s